Metal Up Your Ass Read online

  Metal Up Your Ass

  Protected by the Damned™ Book 6

  Michael Todd

  Michael Anderle

  Laurie Starkey

  Metal Up Your Ass (this book) is a work of fiction.

  All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Sometimes both.

  Copyright © 2018 Michael Todd, Michael Anderle, and Laurie Starkey

  Cover by Ryn Katryn Digital Art

  Cover copyright © LMBPN Publishing

  LMBPN Publishing supports the right to free expression and the value of copyright. The purpose of copyright is to encourage writers and artists to produce the creative works that enrich our culture.

  The distribution of this book without permission is a theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like permission to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), please contact [email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  LMBPN Publishing

  PMB 196, 2540 South Maryland Pkwy

  Las Vegas, NV 89109

  First US edition, April 2018

  Version 1.02 November 2018

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Author Notes - Michael Anderle (Pandora)

  Author Notes - Laurie Starkey

  Connect with Michael Todd

  Books by Michael Todd

  Books written as Michael Anderle

  Metal Up Your Ass Team

  Beta Readers

  Bree Buras

  Dorothy Lloyd

  Tom Dickerson

  Dorene Johnson

  Diane Velasquez

  JIT Readers

  James Caplan

  Kim Boyer

  Peter Manis

  Joshua Ahles

  Sarah Weir

  Paul Westman

  Micky Cocker

  Larry Omans

  If we missed anyone, please let us know!

  Weapons Consultant

  John Kern

  Proprietor

  Spurlock's - Henderson NV

  Editor

  Lynne Stiegler

  Dedication

  To Family, Friends and

  Those Who Love

  to Read.

  May We All Enjoy Grace

  to Live the Life We Are

  Called.

  — Michael Anderle

  1

  It had been a month and a half since Stephanie and Katie had brought the idea of hunting unsuspecting demon assholes to Korbin’s attention.

  After the first one he was sold, though he still had his concerns.

  The two girls had spent the majority of their time on this task, finding the demons and eliminating them where they could. They definitely had started to see a change in the way the rich were doing business, and politicians were up in arms. The word was out that these demons were being hunted, and they did not like that in the least.

  Stephanie looked at the Golden Gate bridge as she and Katie walked along.

  She loved San Francisco, even with its damned hills and constant fog. Katie could take it or leave it, and was only there for the mission: to take out a possessed California senator. He was more than just pocketing contributions. He was running the Senate like a personal bank.

  He squashed his competition in every way, mostly because Big Business padded his pockets and pushed him to introduce bills that served only his interests. He was a scoundrel and a piece of shit, and he needed to be taken care of.

  “So, after this you wanna go to Fisherman’s Wharf?” Stephanie asked. “I understand they have great food… Hold up.” She put an arm out. “We are here.”

  Katie peeked around the corner to find two tall, muscular bodyguards, their scowls letting her know exactly what they were out there for. They were both strapped, earpieces in their ears, and sunglasses on, even though it was night time. Katie turned back to Stephanie and nodded, then straightened her shirt and fluffed her hair. They turned the corner and sauntered up to the men.

  “Ladies?” one of them growled, not breaking character.

  “Possessed?” Stephanie asked, looking at Katie.

  “Yep,” Pandora replied.

  “We have confirmation,” Katie replied.

  “Aw, what a shame,” Stephanie said, lifting her arm. “They are such handsome fellas.”

  She hit the first guy right in the nose, knocking his glasses to the ground. He grabbed his face as the blood flowed and glared at her with the red rings in his eyes shining brightly. He lunged toward Stephanie and the two rolled across the ground as they battled it out.

  Katie looked at the other guard and smiled before baring her teeth and leaping onto his chest. She dug her knees in and swiped at his face, but she couldn’t hang on and before long he had the upper hand. He threw her to the ground and pulled his gun. Katie swiped her leg up to knock the piece from his hand.

  A little help here? Katie huffed as she asked for Pandora’s assistance.

  I might not always be here. Pandora yawned. You need to learn to protect yourself.

  “OUCH, YOU FUCKING BASTARD!” Katie screamed, reaching up to her head.

  The guard had grabbed Katie by the hair and lifted her to her feet.

  Katie threw a punch, but it barely fazed the guy. She rolled her eyes and sighed.

  She finally yanked out her knife and sliced his hand, forcing him to let her go. He hissed and moaned, holding his hand tightly as he glared at Katie with red eyes. She smiled and punched him in the nose as hard as she could.

  He looked at her for a moment in confusion, then his eyes rolled straight back in his head and he fell to the ground with a thud. Katie bent over him as Pandora pulled the demon from his chest and sent it back to hell.

  You’re just mad at me because I wouldn’t get the second dozen DONUTS, bitch. Katie wiped her bloody hands on the bodyguard’s jacket and glanced at Stephanie, who was punching the other guard in the face as she straddled him.

  The guy grabbed her wrist and slowly sat up with Stephanie in his lap, then flipped her over and held her down, growling and hissing. Katie shook her head and ripped a fence post out of the cement.

  “You didn’t even take the lady out for lunch,” Katie bitched, shaking her head. “Where are your manners, asshole?”

  She swung the metal rod hard at his head and he fell on top of Stephanie, unconscious. She struggled to roll him off her, breathing heavily.

  “Thanks,” Stephanie said, watching as Katie pulled the demon from his body and dissolved it. “He wouldn’t have been a fun date at all.”

  “I just hope the Senator hasn’t run out the back door by now.” Katie frowned and helped Stephanie to her feet. “That would be a waste.”

  The two crept to the door and slowly opened it, pausing when they heard a man singing. Stephanie grimaced and raised her eyebrows at Katie.

  “Is that Queen?” Stephanie whispered.

  Katie shrugged and continued into the house, following the singing to a room where the senator was obviously taking some “me t
ime.” He had cucumbers over his eyes, a strange orange facial mask which was mostly dry, and Bose headphones pumping Queen into his skull.

  Katie scratched her cheek and looked at Stephanie, who shrugged.

  The girls flanked him and smiled.

  “I wonder if he is imagining himself onstage right now?” Stephanie giggled, looking down at the senator. “That combover just flappin’ in the breeze, makeup covering his face, tight leather pants with his belly hanging over the edge. You know, the real sexy stuff.”

  “He’s got the mic in his hand right now,” Katie continued. “He’s singing into it, and he has a Steven Tyler sash tied to the stand.”

  Oh, for fuck’s sake, Pandora growled. Will you two fucking shut up already?

  Pandora reached from Katie’s chest into the senator’s and yanked his demon out. Both the senator and the demon screamed and growled.

  Then the senator passed out.

  Let’s just kill him and go get dinner. I don’t have time for you two to pussyfoot around, Pandora spat, dissolving the demon and sending it back to hell.

  “Someone has her panties in a twist,” Stephanie remarked. “We have time for one more before dinner. Come onnnn…it’s a club just seven blocks away.”

  This is so annoying, Pandora grumped.

  “Mmmm. Yeah, I’m up for another one.” Katie agreed, taking one last look at the unconscious senator. “This time we should leave Eric in an alley, though. I’m sure he will love it.”

  Stephanie chuckled as they left the room. “Poor Eric. He always gets the short end of the stick.”

  “What else do we have to do other than fuck with each other?” Katie giggled.

  They walked out the front door to be greeted by the moon over the bay, and Stephanie took a deep breath and skipped down the walkway to the street. Katie looked down at the guard who had given her such a tough time. He was groaning as he tried to pick himself up off the ground.

  “Stay down there, buddy.” She kicked him in the head.

  He dropped again. “You’ll thank me in the morning…or not. Either way, sweet dreams.”

  Derek sat on the cool cement floor, opening boxes and checking the contents off his list.

  He was having a full nerd-out, excited to receive his computers so quickly. The new base was really coming along, and would be fully operational very soon.

  Stephanie had put everything she had into getting the place going, whenever she wasn’t hunting down demon-infested bigwig scumbags.

  The team had made the base secure, erecting a twelve-foot-high chain-link fence with concertina wire billowing across the top of it that ran past the new buildings they were working on and was about three hundred yards out from the edge of the original compound. The rest of the area had been cleaned up and painted, and the new concrete pads had been poured. Derek was happy to be able to start his project. He had hoped a new computer workspace would be part of the move, and Korbin had not disappointed him.

  “So, uh, what exactly is this whole thing going to do?” Calvin asked, pulling cords out of one of the boxes and looking at them in confusion.

  “This will be a server room,” Derek replied. “I’ve got three 72u stacks with multiple redundancy and three connections to the internet. It would have been smaller, but thank fuck the military was here before us. Korbin would have blanched at the cost of running cable out to the middle of nowhere.”

  “Okay,” Calvin lifted an eyebrow, “but what does it DO?”

  “It’s surveillance, it’s research, and it’s operations,” Derek said excitedly. “It’s a window to the outside world before we set foot in it. All I need now are a couple of high-powered drones.”

  “Uh, where does this dongle go?” Calvin asked, standing up and looking around.

  “God.” Derek rolled his eyes and marching over. “That’s not a dongle, this is a—"

  “Hey, hey!” Calvin put his hands in the air. “You don’t need to show me your bigger dongle. I think I’m good on that one.”

  “You are impossible,” Derek replied, chuckling.

  “Hey, you’re the weird IT guy here, with your dongles, dingles, shafts, and whatever else you got hidden in those boxes.” Calvin laughed. “Don’t blame me.”

  The Seventy-Two were an enigmatic group of demons with their own structure and authority. T’Chezz might have been part of that Seventy-Two, but he was certainly not on the top rung.

  The Seventy-Two were comprised of three levels, with each level having three sections of eight.

  T’Chezz knew the math, and he also knew how difficult it was to work your way up the ranks. He was presently standing in front of several of the higher-ups, who were sitting around a large circular table in a leisurely fashion. This was his chance to pitch himself and make his future plans known. He was nervous—times like this were pretty much the only time he ever got nervous—but if he had these demons’ support he could solidify the next steps in his plans.

  T’Chezz looked at each of the five faces and, swallowing hard, moved forward, his big feet shuffling. When he reached the table he clasped his large hands in front of him and cleared his throat. Five of the eight prime-level demons were in the room, including Moloch, Asmodeus, Ba’al, Belial, and Azazel. None of them seemed very interested in listening to him, and T’Chezz knew there were several demons vying to move up the ladder right now.

  “My plan starts out simply enough,” T’Chezz began. “We’ll infiltrate Earth by taking over as many human bodies as possible, then my minions will assume leadership of each of the countries. Once I rule the entirety of the planet I’ll create a new hell, or like the humans say, ‘Hell on Earth.’”

  “That is very ambitious.” Moloch leaned back and looked at T’Chezz.

  “I agree.” Asmodeus nodded. “Going against the entire world, even country by country, seems a bit ambitious. And why isn’t Lucifer’s wife with us, as she normally would for an interview such as this?”

  T’Chezz looked at the ground, unsure what to say to that. It was true, she wasn’t there. He had done his best to make sure she would never be at the table again.

  There were multiple ways to climb the ladder of success.

  “Perhaps she was not interested in hearing T’Chezz’s plan,” Moloch suggested.

  Damn, Moloch was helping him. That was unexpected.

  When he was successful, they would have no choice but to take notice of what he had done. It would be grand; bigger than anything the Seventy-Two had ever accomplished, and it would be something to hoist him up the ranks to where he ultimately wanted to be.

  T’Chezz was in the second section of eight in the top level, and his goal was to work his way up to the top eight.

  He knew through his sources that there were three seats open on the top level, and he deserved to be in one of them. He had served Lucifer faithfully for centuries by doing his bidding, keeping things tight and neat, and taking care of the loose ends, but he had become restless.

  He wanted more. He wanted a seat at the table in front of him, and he was tired of just sitting around waiting for it to happen. He wanted more troops to command, more slaves, and a say in his own existence.

  He would take what he wanted from the humans, including that bitch of a sister of his, and he would make the top-level demons give him his rightful place.

  All he had to do at this point was figure out how to get around the new weapons. He still hadn’t gotten his hands on one—or the maker, for that matter—and that posed a fundamental problem. This issue was becoming a serious thorn in his side.

  And as if they could read his mind—and they might be able to—Ba’al spoke up just then.

  “Humans are interesting creatures. I haven’t been topside in a few decades, but I’m sure they haven’t changed all that much. One thing they do have is gusto. Have there been any issues so far?”

  “Actually,” T’Chezz replied in a low tone, “one thing is giving me a bit of a problem.”

  “You aren�
��t speaking of your sister, are you?” Moloch sighed. “It would be a shame if she were to be your undoing.”

  “I am not worried about her. She is not an issue,” T’Chezz told them, his eyes inadvertently flicking to an empty chair.

  A chair that should be his. Irritation was building inside of him. “The humans have new weapons, something that injures the demon inside the human body. They can be lethal.”

  “What?” Belial looked at Azazel. “I thought we took care of that issue.”

  “Yes, well it seems they outsmarted us, Belial,” Azazel replied. “I am not too worried. Humans tend to self-destruct.”

  “I find it concerning,” Asmodeus interjected, “that they are fighting back. That’s just what I didn’t want to see.”

  “Well, boys,” Ba’al yelled above their loud voices. “Let’s just see what T’Chezz can do with this. I mean, it’s better to know and plan accordingly than to not know. Right, T’Chezz?”

  He nodded, feeling as if Ba’al’s comment was more of a warning than an opportunity.

  2

  The alley was dark and smelled like sewage. It was just a fantastic environment for Eric, who was waiting for Stephanie and Katie to finish their mission.